The Battle Inside: How Surrender and Study Saved My Life

The Battle Inside: How Surrender and Study Saved My Life

(This testimonial was written by one of our incarcerated students, sharing their faith and study of God’s Word.)

After my incarceration, the real inner work of learning to know myself began. Thank God that I recognized my errors. I knew I needed to go within myself if I was going to make any permanent changes, and if I didn’t change the way I was living, the way I was using my thoughts and my words, at some point sooner or later it would be the end of me.

My inner child needed help because I was in great pain. When I began healing, I did some research and came across ICCS. I concentrated on myself totally and did little else. I became very committed to getting well. Some of it was a little weird, yet I moved forward in the process — after all, it was my life on the line. It became almost 24 hours a day, nonstop, for almost two years. I began reading and studying everything I could find about alternative ways to heal. I truly believed it could be done.

Prior to this, I spent long periods of time alone, beating pillows and screaming. A little of every method worked. I also worked on understanding and forgiveness. I began to understand. I realized the way I was brought up; I couldn’t have done everything differently than I did. No one taught me a different approach, and this was my way of life. Step by step, I started to grow into a new perspective and let go of all the distortion I had surrounded myself with in my past.

In this journey, sometimes we don’t trust life or other people — it’s really because we don’t trust ourselves.

My spiritual growth played a big role, and it came in such an unexpected way. I began to improve the quality of my life.

The methods I use are not my methods. Most of them are as old as time. If anybody starts reading self-growth books, they will find the same message. I do not have a church. I am a free spirit. I express what I learned and lived in simple language, so I hope I can reach many people. This path is a wonderful way to take charge of your life.

When I got incarcerated about 15 years ago, I was 21 years old, and I had no idea who I was or what I wanted to do in life. I had no idea that I would be able to bring hope to myself and others today.

Raymond C.